Depressed, addicted and miserable

“It all started when I found out that my son had been shot. He was only 16 years old. I remember when my sister came to fetch me to go to the crime scene. He was already inside a body bag.

 

I was shattered. I did not know what to do. I questioned God. I could not understand why that had to happen. I was angry at everyone and did not know how to handle the pain I felt. I slipped into depression. I felt like I was trapped in a dark hole.

 

After my son’s funeral, I was frustrated. I contemplated suicide every day. I wanted to die. I started drinking alcohol excessively and smoking dagga.  My life was in shambles. They were days I screamed, hoping that the pain I felt would disappear but that did not help. I could not even recognise myself any more.

 

I used to attend services in the Universal Church, but I was not fully obedient to the word of God. After my son’s passing, I did not have the strength to go to church. I was tired of living in sorrow. I decided to go back to attending services in the church. I was told that in order for God to heal me, I had to surrender my pain to Him. I participated in the chains of prayers for my inner healing and for my deliverance from addiction and depression. It was hard but I had to persevere. I had to trust that God would see me through.

 

I also received counselling and was advised to attend the Wednesday and Sunday services. I learnt to be sincere with God. I had to open my heart to Him and allow Him to heal me. I was also able to stop drinking and smoking.

 

My life changed. I was able to make peace with my son’s passing. I understood that his time had come. I am no longer depressed. I am no longer a sad and miserable person. I am fulfilled inside. I was only able to overcome the pain I had through my faith in God,” said Susan.