I felt rejected

“I felt rejected and alone. It all started with my parents’ separation. I had to live with my father and his family. I felt mistreated and ignored because my father only had eyes for his new partner and never took my side in any disagreement. His family mistreated me. As a result, I developed anger and grudges towards my entire family, especially my father.

This made me seek happiness elsewhere. That's when I found companionship in friends and addictions during my darkest moments. I used to smoke, drink, sleep around and watch a lot of pornography, hoping they would make me happy, but they only offered temporary relief, followed by more pain and hurt. I had low self-esteem, no motivation and felt like a reject in this world. I also had inexplicable fear, struggled to sleep well at night and felt like I was born to suffer.

All this caused me to have suicidal thoughts. I thought dying would be better than being alive. I went to many places looking for a solution and had rituals done, but nothing helped.

My mother started attending the Universal Church and invited me to go with her. I joined her because I could see a positive change in her and hoped to find some help for myself as well. From the very first day, I felt freed from the heavy burden I had been carrying for years. I decided to continue attending services because I believed that all my other problems would also be solved.

Through the counselling and chains of prayers, I started seeing changes in myself. I stopped going out with bad friends, no longer slept around and was set free from my addictions and pornography. I surrendered my life to God and got baptised in water. I understood that God loved me and wanted to help me change from the inside out. I realised that I needed the Holy Spirit to find fulfilment and overcome my sense of emptiness. I decided to let go of the grudges and hatred I harboured. I committed myself fully to Him. 

When God blessed me with His Spirit, I no longer felt rejected. Instead, I felt chosen and loved, and experienced joy, peace and confidence. It was amazing! My life was forever changed. I no longer have fear, sleepless nights or feelings of rejection. I don’t dwell on the past anymore and I am now prudent and plan for my future. I have a good relationship with my father and his family. I love being alive and just want to serve God every waking moment of my life,” said Vuyisile.